I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize