i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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