The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
