my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
