So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I just gargled with NyQuil
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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