i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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