She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
