omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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