do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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