haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
