yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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