If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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