is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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