Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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