its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He kissed a someone with a penis
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
