I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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