I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
cat food counts as protein by the way
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
