i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I have already put on my inside pants.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
