I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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