She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
