The maid of honor just puked.
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
the room spins SO much faster in panama
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Randomize