Its about making memories worth repressing
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize