Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize