I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
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This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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