I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
he shaved USA in his pubs
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
