i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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