This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
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