I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize