Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
