I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
