Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize