Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
they need to just BURY HIM!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
