you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
