That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
