I bet he comes in French.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
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