a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
