im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
