I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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