Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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