Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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