kristin has been a bad kristin
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
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