please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
