Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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