I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
How does one acquire holy water?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
