Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
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so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
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Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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