Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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