Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
