I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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