Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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