my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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