In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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